• Eddie

The World’s Most Dangerous Bean

Lupini Beans are a ridiculously delicious vegan superfood. They’re packed with 36g of protein per 100g serving, are full of antioxidants, arginine, and more metal than Judas Priest (great source of Iron, zinc and copper). Think of them as the bean shaped answer to every jerk’s “so, where do you get your protein from?” line of questioning. So why have you never heard of them?

Maybe it’s because if you prepare them incorrectly they can give you Lupin Poisioning—and you don’t want anything to do with that mess; symptoms include: dilated unresponsive pupils, confusion, slowed thought and disorientation, flushed face and/or fever, high heart rate and blood pressure, tremors, difficulty with or slurred speech, in-coordination, dizziness, burning dry mouth, stomach pain, and anxiety or “malaise”.

To avoid any potential toxic alkaloids, we’re going to be super careful and take our time. Treat this like the slowest food ever.

  1. Start out with a 12oz bag of dried Lupini beans. Give them a quick rinse and sort out any funky looking beans or stones. Put them in a big bowl and soak overnight.

  2. Drain and rinse the beans. Boil up a big pot of salty water (it should taste like the ocean) and simmer the beans for 1 hour. Drain in a colander and rinse with cold water. Wash out that big bowl and return them to it, covering with fresh water.

  3. For the next 5 days rinse the beans well, change the water and soak, once in the morning and once at night.

  4. On day 6, you’re going to be a brave little bee and try your first bean (they aren’t poisonous anymore, so this isn’t Russian Roulette with Beans). It’s not going to taste awesome yet, but you’re just testing for bitterness. If it’s bitter enough that you make a face, keep rinsing and soaking for another day or two. If it just tastes like a bean, you’re good to go.

  5. Now pickle the little suckers. Sterilize some jars and ¾ fill them with Lupinis and a handful of green olives. Add your favorite pickle brine, or just go old school and soak them in salty, garlicy, vinegary water.

  6. Let those hang out in the fridge for at least 3 hours before serving. Use a slotted spoon and scoop out some beans and olives. Put them in a little bowl with a splash of olive oil and a twist of black pepper and get your pickled protein power.

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© 2018 Eddie McNamara