• Eddie

Eggplant and Broccoli Veggie Balls

Dude, do those vegetarian meatballs taste like real meatballs? Hell no they don’t. Meatballs are half assed hamburgers, and ground beef has poop in it (read the link). These are not only delicious, they’re 100% fecal matter free.


1 head broccoli, florets only (save the stalks for a slaw)

1 large eggplant, peeled and chopped

1 C breadcrumbs

1 C grated mozzarella 

2 eggs

1 t adobo (this is the MVP of all spice blends)

1 t smoked paprika

2 T chili paste (Sriracha or Sambal or any kind of hot sauce works were)

2 t ground cumin


  1. Fill a large pot with salty water and bring it to a boil. Boil the broccoli for 2 minutes until it’s super green like Chinese takeout broccoli. Remove the broccoli with a slotted spoon. Transfer to a cutting board and mince. 

  2. Keep the water boiling and add the eggplant. Boil for 20 minutes. Drain and mash. 

  3. In a large bowl, combine the broccoli mince, mashed eggplant, and the remaining ingredients. Stir to combine. The hot eggplant should melt the cheese. Refrigerate the mixture for 30 minutes

  4. Preheat oven to 400F

  5. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper and spray it with Pam/Misto. Use an ice cream scooper (or whatever the hell you want) to form the balls. Place them on the baking sheet and bake for 30 minutes. Check them out. If they’re golden brown and kind of crispy, they’re done, if not, give them a few more minutes.

  6. Serve with pasta, or don’t. It’s your life. 

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© 2018 Eddie McNamara